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HealthFive signs that you probably have an unhealthy relationship

Five signs that you probably have an unhealthy relationship

Very few of us in life will sit down and really have a think about our relationships with alcohol. After all, it’s a part of our culture, all our friends drink and you’ll certainly know somebody that drinks more than you.

However, it’s a really important thing to do, particularly at present where more people are living with alcohol addiction than ever before. While moderate drinking may not pose much of a problem for some, for others it can develop into an unhealthy relationship, with a quick pint at the pub turning into two, three, four and beyond. 

That can often go unnoticed, but there will be signs that suggest you may have an unhealthy relationship with booze, so it can be a good idea to stop and take stock of how much you’r drinking and the reasons for doing so. To help you do that, here are five signs that you may have an unhealthy relationship with the substance…

You Use Alcohol as a Coping Mechanism

One of the clearest signs of an unhealthy relationship with alcohol is using it as a way to cope with emotions, stress, or difficult situations. If you regularly reach for a drink to manage feelings of anxiety, sadness, or frustration, it may signal a deeper problem.

Alcohol can temporarily numb emotions, but it doesn’t address the root causes of distress. Over time, relying on alcohol for emotional relief can lead to dependency and worsen mental health issues, creating a harmful cycle. Developing healthier coping mechanisms, such as exercising, talking to a friend, or practising mindfulness, is a healthier way to handle stress.

You Struggle to Limit Your Drinking

Do you find it difficult to stop after one or two drinks? Do you often drink more than you intended, even when you planned to “take it easy”? Struggling to control the amount you consume is a red flag.

Unplanned binge drinking or consistently exceeding recommended limits may indicate that alcohol is starting to take precedence over self-control. In the UK, health guidelines suggest that adults should not regularly consume more than 14 units of alcohol per week, spread across several days. Exceeding this limit frequently can harm your health and suggests an unhealthy dependence on alcohol.

Your Drinking Interferes with Your Responsibilities

When alcohol begins to interfere with your ability to fulfil daily responsibilities, it’s a sign that your relationship with drinking has become problematic. For instance, you might struggle to concentrate at work due to hangovers, neglect household chores, or miss important events because of drinking or its after-effects.

If alcohol starts taking priority over your obligations or you find yourself justifying irresponsible behaviour with phrases like “I deserve to unwind,” it’s time to reassess your habits. Consistently putting drinking ahead of responsibilities can have long-term consequences for your career, relationships, and overall quality of life.

You Experience Guilt or Regret About Your Drinking

Feeling guilty, ashamed, or regretful after drinking is another sign that your relationship with alcohol may not be healthy. These feelings often arise when drinking leads to poor decisions, such as saying or doing things you wouldn’t normally do or putting yourself in risky situations.

If you find yourself waking up with the thought, Why did I drink so much?, or constantly promising to “cut down” but failing to follow through, it’s worth considering whether alcohol is having a negative impact on your life. Guilt is a natural response to recognising harmful behaviour, but addressing the underlying issue is crucial for lasting change.

Your Social Life Revolves Around Alcohol

While it’s normal to enjoy a drink during social gatherings, an over-reliance on alcohol for socialising can signal an unhealthy relationship. If most of your plans involve drinking, or if you feel uncomfortable attending events where alcohol isn’t available, it may indicate that alcohol has become central to your lifestyle.

Similarly, if your friendships are based primarily on drinking together, it may be worth exploring other activities that don’t involve alcohol. Diversifying your social life can help reduce dependency and provide healthier, more fulfilling ways to connect with others.

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